ALL BITCHES THIS IS MY HOME TOWN TAKE A FUCKING SEAT WHILE I TELL YOU THIS STORY. GET A BOWL OF POPCORN BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS DOPE
IN THE 1940’S PORTLAND WAS PUTTING IN LAMPPOSTS AND FOR WHATEVER GOD DAMN REASON THIS ONE NEVER GOT FILLED.
IN 1946, DICK FAGAN, AN AMERICAN IRISHMAN WHO WROTE FOR THE OREGON JOURNAL, GOT BLOODY FUCKING BORED AT HIS JOB AND WOULD LOOK OUT HIS WINDOW ONTO THIS SAD EXCUSE FOR ROAD CONSTRUCTION HOLE. ONE DAY HE SAID “FUCK THIS” AND PLANTED SOME FLOWERS.
HE WROTE ABOUT THIS NEW FUCKING PARK AND SPOKE ABOUT HOW LEPRECHAUNS LIVED THERE AND SHIT. MOTHERFUCKING LEPRECHAUNS IN THE MIDDLE OF DOWNTOWN, WHAT THE SHIT.
HOLD ONTO TO THE EDGE OF YOUR SEATS BECAUSE THIS RIDE GETS EVEN BETTER. THIS PARK HOLDS A GUINNESS WORLD RECORD FOR BEING THE SMALLEST PARK WITH WITH INFORMATION SAYING “It was designated as a city park on 17 March 1948 at the behest of the city journalist Dick Fagan (USA) for snail races and as a colony for leprechauns”. MOTHER. FUCKING. SNAIL RACES. BITCHES.
IT’S EVEN BEEN PIMPED OUT OVER THE YEARS
HO HO HO MOTHERFUCKS WE CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS HERE
WE CARE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT.
THE BEST PART IS THAT IT EVEN HAD OCCUPY PORTLAND PROTESTERS
SO I HOPE YOU FUCKING LEARNED SOMETHING TODAY ABOUT TINY ASS PARKS.
This amazing artifact came by in my Twitter feed today and it is too special not to share. It is a glove that was purchased in 1851 as a tourist souvenir at London’s Great Exhibition, which was attended by a variety of famous individuals, from Charles Darwin to Charlotte Brontë. The leather glove is special because it contains a map that shows the routes to Crystal Palace in Hyde Park, which was the main staging area for the exhibition. It appears to be made for a child, perhaps in case he lost his parents in the crowds. The glove is one of a variety of maps that was produced for the many visitors to the city. Another is this wonderful folding specimen printed on silk, which shows a great amount of detail (check out the enlargements). London in the palm of your hand: a functional memento from the time that the tourist industry was beginning to boom.
Pic: Kew, The National Archives, EXT 11/159 (c. 1851). This the source of the image; here and here is more information on the glove (the latter webpage, from the archive that keeps the artifact, suggests it was a kid’s glove). The glove features on various blogs, such as this one; I saw it in this tweet today.